You Are Thwarting Your Own Efforts

I'm talking to you, Whoever-Stocks-My-Office's-Shared-Bathroom-Facilities.

I have noticed that the paper towel dispenser is often crammed SO. FULL. of paper towels that they exert a Chinese-finger-trap-like effect on themselves.

I attempt to pull out a paper towel, but it is held in a vice-like grip by the weight of its fellow disposable hygiene products straining against the confines of their metal home. This weight, combined with my wet hands, quickly leads to me tearing the soggy paper towel into 15 tiny pieces in a futile attempt to remove it.

I am unable to dry my hands with these 2" x 2" shreds of Cheap Office Supplies brand paper towel, so I try to pull another paper towel out, with the same results. Finally, in frustration, I pull out a handful of 5 or 6 paper towels, use one of them to dry my hands, and throw them all away.

I realize, Office Cleaning Service, that you probably think you are saving yourself from having to restock the bathroom more than twice per day by giving us such an abundance of paper towels! Perhaps you are even motivated by an altruistic concern that we, the Office Drones, might be caught without drying implements!

What you fail to realize is that I am now using an average of 8 paper towels every time I dry my hands.*

You are actually forcing me to deplete the bathroom stocks far quicker than is necessary.

Please, let the paper towels have some room to breathe, so that when I need one it slides easily out from under its brethren in one contiguous piece that is suitable for hand-drying!

I will use less paper towels, feel like less of a landfill-filling asshole, and you get to stock the bathroom less often! Everybody wins!


*Also, due to a crippling addiction to caffeine, I pee at least 80 times each workday.